Starting Over

Don't ya just love the twists and turns that life throws at you when you get a little too comfy and cozy? Just when you get your tush smooshed into the sweet spot where you think you everything is right in the world reality starts creeping up on you like the Jaws theme music and ends with a big old bite out of your ass. 

Here's the thing. My first official writing job is no more. Just as swiftly as it entered my life, it exited even faster. Probably wouldn't have been such a big deal had I not quit my boring, responsible, soul-sucking, steady paycheck job to devote my time to following my dream. But I did, and it was and now I'm jobless. 

I can't lie, I've had more than my usual freak outs in the last few weeks. I've had every emotion from sadness, to fear to embarrassment. It's ridiculous how much having a job can define someone. I've worked since I was 16 years old, what do I do now?? The embarrassment  has been the worst because who really wants to admit they made a bad decision? I've never been a person to jump without a net and I'm not sure I will again.  All I can picture is my family living in our mini van down by the river. (And just to clarify, the van is NOT mine. It's my husbands. I cannot bring myself to be a mini van mom. It clashes with my purple hair ;) )

Things like this force you to reevaluate a lot of things. I know things could be worse. I don't have a job but I have my family, our home and our health. Those are the most important things. Looking for a job absolutely sucks. I haven't had to do that in almost 9 years and I'm quickly realizing that I'm not as qualified for things as I'd like to think I am. 

BUT! I'm a persistent and plucky little shit, so I will rise to this occasion. I know exactly what I don't want in a job and now is a great time to find something new.I had a few back up plans in mind and here's what I've come up with. 

I could live my ultimate nerd dream and work at a bookstore during the day and write my own stories at night. 

I could combine my roller skating skills with my teen age fast food experience and be a skating car hop at Sonic. 

I can apply for any and everything I see (within reason. this old girl keeps her clothes on and does not "shake it" in a sexy way) and see what new adventure comes out of this. 

I think that's what I'll do. It might make for a hell of a novel one day.